Thursday, April 1, 2010

My Tuppence Worth

As Joe mentioned down below there, it's so exciting to be entering the blog world of not having a baby.  I can hardly contain myself.  And as he also pointed out, it's not his baby I'm not having, we wouldn't want people getting the wrong idea here.  We're both not having babies, respectively.  Isn't that a coincidence?

Anyway, while he is diplomatically giving intelligent accounts of non-pregnancy and its related matters, I will be mainly concentrating on pointing out the trials and dismays of babies in general, being semi offensive and griping about how I don't care about your baby's first words or steps or the first time he farted in the tub and how I certainly don't want to see your photos of your kid's junk.

See Joe is a nice person.  I am not.

Anyhoo, I look forward to pouring over websites and books on design deciding exactly how I want to not paint my nursery and figuring out if Baby Gap or something more upscale would be a better choice for not buying baby clothes for the baby I am not having.

It's all so exhilarating, this expedition into the murky waters of not having a lifeform spring forth from my Netherlands.

Here're some things I like hearing about:

Cake
Tequila
Juicy gossip
Travel
What's happening on "Lost"
Farts

Here's some stuff I I don't give a bimble about:

Your baby
Your friend's baby
Babies
Stuff about eating or burying afterbirths

So, welcome!

3 comments:

  1. V.A., I like to put that we're not having a baby together. :-)

    See, I'm the sentimental one. I'm all choked up already!

    Ooo! I know! Let's name our not-kid ""

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh, I am. I was just listening to Static Prevails by Jimmy Eat World.

    Okay, okay, it wasn't Static Prevails it was Bleed American. Close enough!

    ReplyDelete